Wednesday, July 17, 2013

Two Types of People In the World

Although it only depicts shallow differences in taste and personalities, this chart does have a point.

Let's see what I am.

(1) phone - out of necessity due to its being a slide phone, I hold it sideways to type

(2) toilet paper - the one on the right, certainly. If the roll is hanging over a vent it flaps in the most ridiculous manner otherwise.

(3) Doritos - uh, both? If I had to pick one, I would go with the Nacho Cheese, however, as Cheese is the Fifth Element and a solution to many problems in life. (G. K. Chesterton even wrote an essay in praise of cheese.)

(4) video game consoles - I have no opinion here, as I do not own any of them and have only ever borrowed a cousin's Wii (much to parental displeasure).

(5) ?? type of technology - I do not like Apple and any of its iProducts. I am not sure what the little green horned alien represents.

(6) tennis shoes - neither. I wear New Balances because they fit my feet.

(7) hats - a normal baseball hat (i.e., the one on the left), thank you.

(8) phone service - Can I say neither? AT & T is terrible, though. It is a truth universally acknowledged. (To wildly misquote Miss Jane Austen.... I've just finished Sense and Sensibility, and I must say that I, for the second time in my life, thoroughly disagree with the official pairings and instead ship Colonel Brandon and Elinor. They just make sense together.)

(9) energy drink - I have never had either of these. I really do not see the point.

(10) soft drink - Coke. All the way. I'd rather have a Dr. Pepper over a Pepsi, since to me Dr. Pepper has its own taste while a Pepsi is just an imitation Coke. Also, they are not 'pop' or 'soda pop'. They are COKES. All of them. They are all called indiscriminately cokes. 'Soft drinks' if you must be politically correct. This is the South, folks. Deal with it.

(11) Fanta or Sunkist - I like them both. In fact, I cannot think of a difference in taste. However, they are both better in quality than the cheap knockoff versions, which are invariably terrible (the knockoff versions of Grapico are also terrible).

(12) analog or digital - No preference.

(13) video games - I have only ever played Fire Emblem: Radiant Dawn, which is obviously neither of these games because it involves strategy and thus requires actual intelligence instead of just mandating, "Kill everything in sight."

(14) smiley faces - :) It makes no sense the other way around. Just sayin'.

(15) lol/LOL - I use both, with a possible preference for 'lol'. I tend to use 'lol' as a part of a sentence, while I use 'LOL' when that is the sentence. Like this: "We went to the lake lot and Steve pushed Susie in, lol," as opposed to, "Steve pushed Susie in the lake!" "LOL." I also tend to say 'lol' (as used in this manner') as 'lul' - one word - while saying 'LOL' as 'ell oh ell'. Because I'm weird that way.

In Pace Christi,


1 comment:

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